Comments on: Answering questions from non-vegan children

By: Rebekah

Rebekah — Sun, 22 Aug 2010 16:28:56 +0000

Allison – for us it is not about telling our kids that they cannot have something. It is about telling them honestly, and in an age-appropriate way, why we choose not to eat animals or their products. I have found that kids are naturally compassionate and tend to love animals, so if you explain how the farming industry hurts those animals, they won’t WANT to eat them. For example, when explaining why we don’t buy dairy products, I told them that a mommy cow’s milk is for her baby calf, and that the calf has to be taken away from it’s mommy for humans to take the milk. As young kids, they can think about how it would feel to be away from their mommy and it makes them very sad. Another thing my husband and I have agreed on is that we don’t forbid our children from eating anything. We buy the food and eat a certain way at home, but if they are at a friend’s house or a birthday party, they can make their own choices. They will often choose to eat the birthday cake but they have never chosen to eat meat. I think it really empowers them when they feel like they have a choice in the matter.

By: Allison

Allison — Sun, 27 Jun 2010 16:19:40 +0000

I would just like to thank everyone who has given some input on this topic, it can be very difficult. I am trying to conceive and I would raise my child no other way than at minimum vegetarian with seafood. I made the decision to become vegetarian. I know of many people who claim they would hate their parents if they had been raised vegetarian. I, also have dealt with friends in high school, parents of those friends, my OWN family. It can be very difficult for a very young child to have to maintain friendships and not to be picked on. I have concerns about teachers, daycare places, camp leaders, and my own child’s choices. Children have a desire for what they cannot have. Any advice?

By: Melissa

Melissa — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 00:27:22 +0000

lj2002 I love your responce!! Thanks for all the great tips. I am fortunate that my son’s more inquisitive friend is a celiac (as well as her sister, mom and aunt), so she is very understanding when it comes to some people not being able to eat some food. I hope she doesn’t think I am allergic to meat, lol!!

By: deva

deva — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 12:00:52 +0000

When children ask why my kids can’t eat something I say that we don’t eat meat and eggs. If they ask why don’t we eat meat and eggs, I say that we like animals better alive than dead. And we like the little chickie eggs to be able to be born. Kids either look like they had some little epiphany or just shrug and say *well I love hamburgers.*

By: Sami

Sami — Mon, 12 Apr 2010 20:39:06 +0000

I was once taking a group of 5-8 year olds around a petting zoo and had to deal with questions

about why the birds were on a 6″ tether. “To stop them flying away” was my response, to which the

older ones questioned the morality of it. I gave them a pretty netural answer, since most kids of

that age already empathise with animals and don’t need to be told that a bird dosen’t like being

tied up.

My standard answer for most people asking why I am a vegan is “Because I don’t agree with the

animal industry.” It clearly states why I made my choice without being gruesome – and virtually

everyone knows the answer if they were to ask “Why”. It’s non confrontational, non gruesome and

totally honest – all of which I think people appreciate (and so have less of a gut reaction against).

Kids of course, might not know “why”. So I say things like “Because I believe animals should stay in the wild” and sometimes “I don’t think it’s fair to keep animals in cages/on farms/take thier milk/eggs” etc.

By: misovegan

misovegan — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 20:27:57 +0000

I keep it age-appropriate and straight-forward. Some variation on: we don't eat our friends. As my son and his friend got older, 8 or 9, I upgraded the message to, “… because we don't want animals to die for our food. There's plenty to eat without killing animals.”
I only had one situation where the child wanted to know more than the parent would “allow.” He was 9 or 10 and wanted me to tell him “all” the reasons we're vegan. I told him to ask his mom if that would be okay, and she said “”no.” The next time I saw him, he was disappointed, so I told him, “that's okay, you can find out the same way I found out: on the internet!”

By: misovegan

misovegan — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 20:23:11 +0000

jendiggity, I have always been tactfully honest with other people's children, but to be honest, if I were the one to “spill the beans” in such a situation, it wouldn't be my fault that the aunt has built up a shelter based on lies and untold truths. We can only control so much, so we err on the side of honesty, and if that means there are repercussions for someone who was kept in the dark, there's not much we can do to prevent that. Besides, someday she'll find out. Is sooner better than later, in a case like this?

By: busyhappyvegan

busyhappyvegan — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 19:00:53 +0000

Great post! I haven't had to deal with this issue yet, because our daughter's young – but I've definitely thought about how I would handle it. I think something very brief about not eating animals because it hurts them is good enough!

By: jendiggity

jendiggity — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 18:04:51 +0000

I would love to hear from more people with experience here. I recall my aunt being horrified that my young cousin who LOVED and collected pigs would one day find out where her beloved bacon came from! I can only imagine how angry she'd be if I had been the one to spill the beans during a convo about why we don't eat the stuff. I think a lot of parents probably shelter their kids from the truth of what they're eating. Is it overstepping the bounds by being honest, even if you're tactful about it?

By: lj2002

lj2002 — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 18:03:37 +0000

My phrase when young kids ask why we don't eat animals is: “Cuz we think they're cute!” It usually gets a little grin and no further questions.